RAMBLING FROM TOM

HI ALL : I woke up early, at the unlovely -- for a Saturday - hour of 7 am. Everything in my house seems to smell like this special weight gain liquid I been told to 'enjoy' , but, other than that relatively minor complaint, things are good. All the expected side effects and issues have come up to radiation and chemo, and all appear to have been managed quickly.

This point I am at : over the halfway point, etc., makes me think about stuff like transcending pain (how have three weeks gone by???) , the more spiritual elements of such a diagnosis (what lesson was the purposes of this illness?) , and perhaps how I can help the next person who needs to address such a problem.

Thanks to all who have sent good thoughts and everyone who has been of help/support.
Sorry to those of you who I owe return phone calls to -- I lost my voice on Tuesday and
it's shown no sign of coming back; one of my doctors assured me that it will come back, it may just not be for a while - and a while could mean weeks (!). Thanks especially to all of my
family and friends who have made it their business to get me to appointments, to look
after my mental, spiritual, fiscal as well as physical health.

Half Way There

non-verbal

Just to add to Jo-Ann's post a bit - Tom's actually temporarily lost his voice because of the treatment. As you can imagine, this is bittersweet for those of us who want to do all the talking anyway (meaning all the bossy girls in TJ's life). At any rate, email and cards are best for the time being. Tom has been amazed at the outpouring of good wishes and other support. We're trying to remember to post here reguarly, but if you're feeling like you want an update, feel free to be in touch with any of us via email as well.

Second Chemo Tomorrow

Tomorrow, Tom will go in for his second chemotherapy treatment, and it's going to be hard. He's been doing great, but the pain in his throat is formidable. He is having intense difficulty speaking and swallowing. Unfortunately, this makes eating difficult, and he is losing weight. Of course we all know that he's a spry guy to begin with so weight loss at this point is not great and adds to his already significant fatigue.

On the positive side, he's getting closer to the end of these treatments and hopefully closer to remission. Your love and support through calls, emails, packages, cards, AND donations is unbelievable. We've just about reached our initial fundraising goal and have pledges for even more. THANKS SO MUCH!

Keep writing and sending your well wishes to him. The phone is a bit difficult just now, so email, snail mail, and of course, posts to this blog are awesome!

Thanks To All

First of all, thank you to everyone for all of your contributions to my well-being -- it is truly
amazing and humbling to experience just how kind and giving people have been, though it is
also very strange to be the center of such attentions.

It has been a surreal couple of months, and, at some point, would like to collect in one place the many tributes to our recently lost friend, Spencer Gates. Spencer, one of my oldest and most enduring friends, can't be summed up in a paragraph, so this tribute project is on for this summer.

contact

Spoke to Tommy this morning, and he's definitely feeling a bit tired. His cell phone voicemail is full as word trickles out about his situation, and everyone wants to reach out. Please don't be offended if he doesn't get back to you quickly or at all. He hasn't lost his manners - just his energy! Email is definitely preferable to phone calls for the time being - it's just easier for him to manage. If you're feeling anxious and really want an update, feel free to be in touch with Julie, Emily, Jo-Ann or me.

Tom's Diagnosis

By now, most people know that Tom was diagnosed with oropharyngeal cancer in late May. He started what is to be an 8 week course of radiation with 3 rounds of chemotherapy on July 2. He is doing great, except that he is getting tired. This is hard for Tom as he's typically up most of the night drinking coffee, reading books, seeing bands. In fact, in 20 years, I don't think I've ever heard Tom say that he was tired and wanted to hang out at home until this past week-end.

His physicians tell us that his prognosis is good, but it's going to be a long, difficult summer (one nurse told him that it would be like "crawling to the finish line").

So stay tuned to this blog - and we'll keep you posted on his progress. Tom loves getting all your calls and emails, but it's getting a little difficult for him to keep up with them, so don't fret if you don't get an immediate response.

More later - J

Remembering Spencer

Today is a sad day as folks in Boston are gathering to pay tribute to Spencer Gates. Spencer passed away this week-end after a relatively long battle with breast cancer.

I will always remember Spencer fondly from the very limited time I've had with her over the past 15 years or so. She could make me laugh so hard and bite my knuckles after saying something really over the top. We've lost a good one with Spencer, I'm sure others who knew her much better than me will want to share their thoughts.

Why this blog?

I created this blog in order to have a place to funnel requests many of us have been getting about information on Tom's progress and how to help. I hope visitors will also feel free to post their own thoughts, well wishes, and words of encouragement.